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But walking these streets awakens me to how bad San Francisco had gotten even before the coronavirus hit-to how much suffering and squalor I’d come to think was normal. Signs of the city’s pandemic decline are everywhere-the boarded-up stores, the ghostly downtown, the encampments. Now the homeless-and those who care for the homeless-are the only ones left.ĭuring the first part of the pandemic, San Francisco County lost more than one in 20 residents-myself among them.
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But from the outside, what it looks like is young people being eased into death on the sidewalk, surrounded by half-eaten boxed lunches.Ī couple of years ago, this was an intersection full of tourists and office workers who coexisted, somehow, with the large and ever-present community of the homeless. The city government says it’s trying to help. Inside the enclosure, services are doled out: food, medical care, clean syringes, referrals for housing. A young man is lying next to it, stoned, his shirt riding up, his face puffy and sunburned.
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There’s a free mobile shower, laundry, and bathroom station emblazoned with the words DIGNITY ON WHEELS. On the sidewalks all around it, people are lying on the ground, twitching. It’s downtown, an open-air chain-link enclosure in what used to be a public plaza. O n a cold, sunny day not too long ago, I went to see the city’s new Tenderloin Center for drug addicts on Market Street. And many San Franciscans have had enough. There is a sense that, on everything from housing to schools, San Francisco has lost the plot-that progressive leaders here have been LARPing left-wing values instead of working to create a livable city. They did it because he didn’t seem to care that he was making the citizens of our city miserable in service of an ideology that made sense everywhere but in reality. And I, now in early middle age, sometimes wish it weren’t so nice at all.īut I do need you to love San Francisco a little bit, like I do a lot, in order to hear the story of how my city fell apart-and how it just might be starting to pull itself back together.īecause yesterday, San Francisco voters decided to turn their district attorney, Chesa Boudin, out of office. But it’s maddening because the beauty and the mythology-the preciousness, the self-regard-are part of what has almost killed it.
It’s so goddamn whimsical and inspiring and temperate so full of redwoods and wild parrots and the smell of weed and sourdough, brightly painted homes and backyard chickens, lines for the oyster bar and gorgeous men in chaps at the leather festival. If he ever got to heaven, Herb Caen, the town’s beloved old chronicler, once said, he’d look around and say, “It ain’t bad, but it ain’t San Francisco.” The cliffs, the stairs, the cold clean air, the low-slung beauty of the Sunset, the cafés tucked along narrow streets, then Golden Gate Park drawing you down from the middle of the city all the way to the beach. So much has been written about the beauty and mythology of this city that maybe it’s superfluous to add even a little more to the ledger. A passenger shouted that he hoped I’d find a nice girlfriend, and I waved back, smiling, my mouth full of braces and rubber bands.
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When puberty hit, I asked the bus driver to drop me off where the lesbians were, and he did. The hills are so steep that I didn’t learn to ride a bike until high school, but every day I saw the bay, and the cool fog rolling in over the water. But every compromise San Francisco demanded was worth it. For years I told anyone who would listen that I’d been kidnapped. Once, when I was very little, a homeless man grabbed me by the hair, lifting me into the air for a moment before the guy dropped me and my dad yelled. It was always weird, always a bit dangerous. Between the bead curtains of my aunt’s house, I learned you had to let your strangeness breathe. If someone wanted to travel by unicycle or be a white person with dreadlocks or raise a child communally among a group of gays or live on a boat or start a ridiculous-sounding company, that was just fine. I learned young that it was impolite to point when a naked man passed by, groceries in hand. My grandmother’s favorite insult was to call someone dull. The Beats came, then the hippies the moxie and hubris of the place remained. The little city, prone to earthquakes and fires, kept growing. The gold dried up but too many young men with outlandish dreams remained. That’s about when my ancestors came-my German great-great-great-grandfather worked at a butcher shop on Jackson Street. S an Francisco was conquered by the United States in 1846, and two years later, the Americans discovered gold.